I hurt a person. And it wasn’t out of spite, but it wasn’t an accident either. It was mathematical, for optimisation’s sake. It was purely rational.
I have a problem trusting people – I assume the worst – and that makes me try to keep a “Plan B” open in case people let me down. In case they turn out not to be who they seem to be.
But when someone really gives of themselves and places their trust in you, discovering that there is a Plan B – that they are essentially replaceable – hurts.
This blog exists for me to share the things I am discovering on my journey to become a better man. This time, I fell short of this ideal.
But I don’t want to fail to document that fact. There are too many reports of success on the internet. Everyone falls, but nobody talks about it.
I’m talking about it because I want the record here – to help me remember that I can and should be better.
Painting: Nebuchadnezzar by William Blake